English lesson

Maybe I am able to write some things in english, for my english and american friends. ;)

Some of you already know that I felt in love with joel but he "destroyed" it.
I don't know really why. I think it's because if the distance... I know it is hard to handle that, but it's possible.
Never mind but it hurts cause I didn't said "I love you" to a lot of men...
Maybe.. sometimes...We'll see...
I can just sit and hope because I don't want to annoy him with my messages.

But the thing beat me that hard that I wasn't able to hold it anymore and I went to drink some booze.
After 2 years and 4 months clean I fell back to my old attitude.

It was not only because of him... I had a fight with myself months ago... but it made me stronger.
I had made the decision to not do it again.
Even because my brother has lain in the hospital as my head was finally clear.

Now I have some complications with my best friend.
He treated me bad and didn't apologized...
It is not the first time he did that... And everytime I am the one who feels bad.
Ok, I am a very impulsive woman and I am full of hormones but he knows that.
And everything I wanted was an apologize.

Now I will see if he's getting down from his high horse or not...
And maybe I have to make consequences...

We'll see.
Ok. It is short but I think I didn't forgot something.

Except: I am still missing Joel that much.
Maybe I'll never forget him because he's the man, I'll never get...